Question: Should I sign Do Not Resuscitate paperwork for my sick, elderly mother?
Dear Rabbi Enkin,
My dear Mother is 89 years old and in the hospital again with congestive heart failure. The Doctors tell me if she has another heart attack she could also have a stroke and be left totally paralyzed and in a vegetative state. Of course, only G-d would know if this is to happen. The Doctors are trying to convince me to sign Do Not Resuscitate paperwork should this happen. Please help me with what I should do and what G-d thinks about this.
Thank you, Suzie
Answer: Dear Suzie,
First of all, there is nobody in the world who knows "what God thinks about this". My job as a rabbi is to offer you rabbinic and halachic advice as I understand it.
Your situation is very difficult and I feel for you.
You must ask your mother what SHE prefers. She is entitled to forgo resuscitation should she so desire, though I strongly counsel against it.
It sounds as if your decision may be influenced by what appears to be the doctors' scaring you into signing something. If so, ignore the doctors completely.
Imagine *this* scenario -- you DON'T sign the DNR -- and she has another heart attack ----- and she comes through it safely. (Now, can you imagine what you would have felt like had you signed it?)
May God bless you during this difficult time.
Regards,
Rabbi Ari Enkin
Ramat Beit Shemesh, Israel
First of all, there is nobody in the world who knows "what God thinks about this". My job as a rabbi is to offer you rabbinic and halachic advice as I understand it.
Your situation is very difficult and I feel for you.
You must ask your mother what SHE prefers. She is entitled to forgo resuscitation should she so desire, though I strongly counsel against it.
It sounds as if your decision may be influenced by what appears to be the doctors' scaring you into signing something. If so, ignore the doctors completely.
Imagine *this* scenario -- you DON'T sign the DNR -- and she has another heart attack ----- and she comes through it safely. (Now, can you imagine what you would have felt like had you signed it?)
May God bless you during this difficult time.
Regards,
Rabbi Ari Enkin
Ramat Beit Shemesh, Israel
