The New Bar or Bat Mitzvah - MitzvahChic

Been reading in the news about Gentile kids who want their own bar or bat mitzvahs? We may all be shocked, but really should we be? Haven't many b'nai mitzvah - particularly the ones that everyone talks about because they are the biggest, most outrageous bashes - drifted away from tradition? What's so Jewish about a "Sex in the City" theme party or a "shopping" theme party? Why shouldn't non-Jewish kids do it too?

Now that non-Jewish kids want to get into the act, we Jewish folk are suddenly all talking again about an issue Jews have been arguing for years - what's OK and what isn't for a bar/bat mitzvah celebration. And what do the choices people make mean to the rest of us?

Jews know the bar or bat mitzvah “event” isn't the party but the service that precedes it. But actually when a Jewish boy turns 13, or a Jewish girl turns 12, that child is automatically a bar or bat mitzvah – a son or daughter of the commandment – whether there's a service and party or not. You don't really need to do anything to be a bar mitzvah! And although there are Jews who would like to see the party part go away , they're actually, um, sort of required: the Talmud states that it's a mitzvah – a commandment – for a father to host a festive meal on the occasion of his son's bar mitzvah.

The Parties that Divide Us

My theory about the huge cultural divide between Jews over bar/bat mitzvah parties – the people who love them and those who can't bear that it happens – is that it's a complete illusion. There is nothing wrong with or inherently non-Jewish about parties. And if you've ever partied with very observant people on festive occasions, you know that's true! There is only something wrong with the WAY we've been partying. We've been ignoring what is fabulous about ourselves and our tradition and looking outside for irrelevant pop culture themes to elevate and embrace. We've been standing in our own treasure field but looking out to some far horizon. What are we, nuts?

I'll let you in on the most amazing discovery of all: Judaism is the coolest bar/bat mitzvah party theme ever. I know it because I wrote the book that has, I think, proved the case once and for all. MitzvahChic, A New Approach to Hosting a Bar or Bat Mitzvah That is Meaningful, Hip, Relevant, Fun & Drop-Dead Gorgeous is about how amazing we are, how amazing the ideas in the Torah are, and what great parties they can inspire. And parties that are about something compelling are way more exciting and special than those that are just elaborate decorating schemes or homages to television characters.

Having It All

MitzvahChic says that the “mitzvah”– the good works/meaning/spirituality – can be fused with high style. More than just fused. MitzvahChic holds that the meaning and the joy, artfully expressed, are what make the celebration magical. MitzvahChic is a blueprint for how a family can have an amazing bar mitzvah experience and use their emotion to electrify their party.

Anyone can hire a decorator to create some mind-altering backdrop; what makes a bar mitzvah truly wonderful is the way it expresses who you are as a family and how this very special event – already experienced by millions before you – is still somehow uniquely your own.