Short summary of every Jewish Holiday:
"They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat. "

What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish mothers? 
"Is ANYTHING all right?"

Where does a Jewish husband hide money from his wife?
Under the Vacuum cleaner.

Jewish Telegram: "Begin worrying. Details to follow."

If a doctor carries a black bag and a plumber carries a toolbox, what does a mohel carry?
A Bris-kit!

What do you call steaks ordered by 10 Jews?
Filet minyan.

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